Thursday, May 16, 2002

NOW SHOW ME THE HONEY! Eve Tushnet has named PoohPundit the best blog in all the wood! Oh, are we gonna party!

Saturday, May 04, 2002

KANGA, who's a bit of a wild kangaroo when you get a bit of the honeywine into her, came up with a new slogan for the Arab News: "We retort, you suicide!"
BOW TO MY WILL, little children of the world! For I am sent of the Great God Disney from Mount Orlando to lay waste to your indigenous culture and replace it with Elmer Fudd and Chicken McNuggets!
I KNOW a few creatures what could take a chompsky outta this guy.
IT'S THE WEEKEND! Time for me and the donkey to toss back a few!

Friday, May 03, 2002

HUMOR BREAK: OK, let's lighten up for a moment. Here is my favorite joke:
The Forest Service has issued a BEAR WARNING in the national forests for this summer. They're urging everyone to protect themselves by wearing bells and carrying pepper spray. Campers should be alert for signs of fresh bear activity, and they should be able to tell the difference between Black Bear dung and Grizzly Bear dung. Black Bear dung is small, round and sometimes has seeds or squirrel fur in it. Grizzly Bear dung has bells in it, and smells like pepper spray.
Ha!
OUR VERY OWN Hundred Acre Wood immigrant Roo (he's older than he looks) sobers up enough to speak truth to power at Foxnews.com today! (Shhhhh! Don't tell Disney! He's really an Aussie! Though why they haven't figured out that kangaroos aren't normally found in English forests is beyond me.)
THIS SORT of thing just needs to stop immediately.
OK, THIS is getting frightening. First, Heffalumps, now reports of Woozle tracks in the Hundred Acre Wood. Where's the New York Times on this story? Where's CNN? And where is Christopher Robin and his precious Department of Woodland Security? What're we paying him for?
THE USUALLY REASONABLE Owl and Pooh Corner's Piglet are scaring all the Wood's critters with their sniping. Says Piglet:
In the last six months or so, Owl, and even more so Owl's website, has increasingly taken on the tone of the asinine college sophomore. You know, the woodland creature who knows more than everybody else, or at least thinks he does, but can’t understand why nobody thinks he’s funny or really cares about his opinion. Worse, he doesn’t understand why he’s not cool, even though he pierces his beak and stays up until noon. Even the possums don’t want to get high with him because he’s always laughing at how much smarter he is than everybody else.
Say, you don't think this whole thing was just a publicity stunt, do you? Naah, couldn't be.
NOW WE ARE SICK? This is just silly.
WOBBLY WATCH: Is Hundred Acre Wood Attorney General Christopher Robin going soft on the Heffalump terrorist threat? Den Beste posits a rope-a-dope policy. Charles Johnson is skeptical. Maureen Dowd relates it to a "West Wing" episode and makes fun of Robin's jumper.
NO BLOGGING for a bit. Must hibernate.

Thursday, May 02, 2002

WHY RABBIT is the best advice columnist in the Hundred Acre Wood!
MICKEY MAUS over at mausfiles.com says:
I must admit, I'm shocked -- not "shocked, shocked!" but actually shocked -- that CBS, NBC, Time Inc., the New York Times, Disney and AOL have been buying up $500 and $600 seats at fundraisers for People for the American Way.
Indeed. With the pittance that bastard Eisner is paying us, his LOYAL, REVENUE-GENERATING CHARACTERS, you'd think he'd be a little more discreet.
ONCE AGAIN, Lileks rules!
I don’t love Disney. I don’t have the same growly reaction some do, perhaps because I realize that it’s inevitable. Nothing I can do. As they say in the Nightmare on Elm Street movies, just lie back and think of Englund. But the less Disney the better. The less Robin Williams, the happier my home will be. Toy Story, yes, but that’s not Disney. Pre-sixties Disney, yes. Pre-Aristocrats Disney. Not Pooh Disney, for heaven's sake - drives me nuts that Disney got to define Pooh for the modern age. Gresham’s Law of Animation ruled the 60s, and Pooh suffered - the cheap scratchy crap that Disney churned out in its lean years drove out the gentle melancholic Pooh illustrations of my childhood. They’re still available, but they’re “Classic Pooh.” Grrrrrr.
Hear, hear!
I SEE Amnesty International is once again whining about the treatment of honeybees. Of course, as Piglet revealed over at NRO's Pooh Corner, records show it's actually bears who are much more mistreated. I mean, how many people have beeskin rugs on their floor? Suppose we'll see a retraction from the Amnesty folks? I'm not holding my breath.
READER AND GOOD FRIEND Eeyore has roused himself out of his depressive state long enough to send along this comment on part of Christopher Robin’s new anti-terrorism initiative:
This mass roundup and detention of “illegal aliens” to the Hundred Acre Wood is just insane. I mean, ye gods, it’s SPRING! This is a FOREST! Things MIGRATE here! What does he expect? It’s like I always say, “People who don't think probably don't have brains; rather, they have grey fluff that's blown into their heads by mistake.”
Indeed.

WELCOME to PoohPundit.com! For blogging about the Hundred Acre Wood! Bear of Very Little Brain, my ass!